For most people, a work of art completed and out in the world is simply a work of art. For an artist, the experience of making a work is often deeply transformatory, enriching, and even cathartic.
When many Americans were flocking to the teachings of Buddhism, I thought I’d investigate or learn a bit of what this teaching was about. I read a little book by a Buddhist monk, and peace activist named Thich Nhat Hanh. It was essentially explaining Buddhism in simple terms. The book began, “Buddha doesn’t mean little fat man, Buddha means to be awake.” Essentially this state of awareness or enlightenment, is being void of illusion. He further described that there is a Buddha within us all.
This idea of being awake or enlightened coupled with the pervasive notion of artist being pioneers of thinking and shaking people up or waking people up to new and revolutionary ideas. As a visual artist, I immediately got an image of myself as a little Buddha with hairdo and all.
As I hadn’t done a self portrait in a while, I drew (below right) myself as a little Buddha. It was several years later before I made this sculpture, and like most of my sculptures, they are in the making for several years. At the time, I was involved in a very serious practice of Ashtanga Yoga and knew the feeling of inner peace which feeling I attempted to infuse into this work. For me, the work itself has to speak the idea before I can consider it complete and ready for casting.
I had also been working on a larger version in a small studio in my home.
Since one of the main Buddhist principles is the notion of true compassion, it was rather ironic that I had one of my most truly compassionate experiences while making this particular artwork. The original material (See: In process maquette page) was made in a classical brown sculpting wax known as micro crystalline wax. Typically, artists work with this wax material and then cast the finished pieces in bronze or another medium.
One morning I woke up, had my breakfast and was suddenly struck by the fact that though I am white-skinned, there I was as a black person in this dark wax material. Holy cow, there I was a black person! Though I had never been prejudiced, and I had always been deeply bothered by any overt racial prejudice, I don’t believe I had truly ever had such a deep and connected experience of compassion, and being black. Later that day I took the subway in NYC and sat across from a black woman. I felt that truly she could have been my sister. There was no innate difference.